The temperature dropped suddenly and I groaned. I only had a quarter of an hour to do my homework – how would I cope with the triplets bawling, my fingers icicles and my breath a wall of fog between me and my paper?

Year 6 was fun, but the homework was too much. Which one of these triangular shapes was a scalenetriangle? Which one of these was a quadrilateral? Why did it matter anyway?

I waved a pretend trident in the air and pretended to stab the maths paper, imagining the blood oozing out.

“Super Spicy,” Ms Hedley called it. Ghost chilli more like!